Friday, August 10, 2007

Nature News!

There must be something in the water; rabies is my guess.

Wis. Cops Capture Diaper-Wearing Monkey
Police issued a warning to the public of the foot-tall monkey with a long prehensile tail: "It is now on the lam, presumably still in the State Street area.[Unless it hijacked a chopper... then it could be anywhere. If I were him, I'd go straight for Brazil... for their extradition laws and zesty waxing practices....]"

Beheaded Snake Sends Man to Hospital
"When I reached down to pick up the head, it raised around and did a backflip almost, and bit my finger," Anderson said. "I had to shake my hand real hard to get it to let loose."
Nature attacks from beyond the grave. BOOOOOOOOOOO.

Bats: Have Rabies, Fuck Up Your Commute
A tailback of about 800 yards built up in one direction, while cars queued for more than a mile at the tunnel's other entrance.
Say bats: "Ah, my ridiculously circuitous plan is one-quarter complete!" No word on ultimate outcome. Blogger's guess: rabies gun?

Woman Kills Raccoon With Her Bare Hands
She pulled the raccoon off the child, told the children to run home and strangled the animal, authorities said.
Her hobbies include pumping iron, eating nails, and foxy boxing.

Favorite phrase of the day: foxy boxing.

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