By request: Best of Japan

I think the best thing about Japan was probably little old Japanese ladies. For example, one day I was wandering around Tokyo and walked into a fancy hotel. I walked past a room where a woman was teaching ikebana. I asked if I could come in and look. She gestured for me to come in and introduced me to the other ladies and then taught me ikebana. Just for the heck of it. I guess just because I am an American.

Another woman who was a friend's host mother had only sons and had always wanted a daughter. So when he brought me over to meet her she went bananas and we traded recipes and sat around having tea and very very simple conversation. Before I left Japan she gave me the apron that she made for herself just before she got married and wished that I could be a beautiful young wife. (Good luck, lady)

Of course there were the clubs, gadgets, and the food was phenomenal. And I have to say I would be remiss in not mentioning to two other awesome things: other foreigners and J-Pop stars. I was at an International college and even when you're out in the city foreigners tended to band together, so I was able to meet people from all over the world. It is amazing to me that I have friends in Australia, Taiwan, Ireland, England, France, Finland, Sweden, Germany, Brazil, etc. etc. all from one year in Japan.

And finally there was this one time at this reggae bar (seriously a Japanese reggae bar) that we used to frequent when a famous and tiny member of a Japanese boy-band spent the majority of the evening trying to steal me away from my 6 foot tall, hockey playing, Michigander boyfriend. The J-Popper would have been ideal, if I was lesbian.

I tend to forget the bad things that happen to me. I have the WORST memory of anyone you will ever know. I think that is how I keep myself happy, I simply can't remember as many bad things as I can good. At that time there were some very serious personal circumstances in my life that collided with the loneliness, racism and sexism in Japan to make my life very very hard. Add in the liquor and the fact that 20 year olds are total idiots, and there you go.

Let's add on a bad note or two for balance's sake. The sexism in Japan was appalling. My friend was stalked by a Japanese man, who in fact attacked her on her porch. When she went to the police they told her it was her fault for looking exotic and that she should cover or dye her red hair. It took a few of our giant buddies jumping the guy and kicking his ass to get him to stop. That's not how things should be, least of all in a nation with one of the world's most liberal constitutions.

Racism against everyone not Japanese is delicately balanced with a pop-star like fanaticism. For example people would touch me, take pictures of me, buy me drinks, and scrutinize me as though I was an object. People like my ikebana teacher were thrilled to meet Americans, while some restaurants had signs up that said "no foreigners" or "Japanese only." Koreans whose ancestors were brought to Japan as slaves and have lived here for generations are not citizens and are not allowed to vote. It is just one more case of injustice in Japan that was too much for me.