Happy Halloween

Count Duckula.

Mo Betta

Mo Betta was a good fish.

He passed away today at approximately 1 pm, at the age of 4 years. He died of some kind of neurological issue, as evidenced by the seizures which ended his life.

Mo started his career as a professional entertainer several years ago when a former roommate acquired him from the Jones & Co. pet store, formerly of Lynnwood. After a few months of deplorable neglect and mishandling, Mo was relocated to my office where he took the position of Curriculum Fish. He even had his own placard in our shared cubical. He primarily spent his time fighting to protect his territory from various objects and blowing bubble nests to attract lady fish.

I don't know what happens to fish when they die. But if there is a fish heaven, he is surely there.

He was a really good fish.

Local Blogger Damn Tired of Death

So two weeks ago it was my uncle, this weekend it was ghoulish tv specials, now it is Mo Betta. My fish.
This morning I came into the office, opened his bowl, dropped food in, turned my computer, and in the slowest double take ever, finally turned around and threw the lid of his bowl back open and peered in anxiously.
There he was, floating nose up, tail down. A co-worker stopped to see what I was doing as I vigorously shook the bowl. Mo did not move. "Maybe he is just cold," she suggested,"Do fish hibernate?"
When I was young our heat was turned off. In north Idaho. In winter. And my fish bowl froze solid. As my mother defrosted the bowl in the sink and I hid in bed weeping pitifully the fish came back to life.
"Fish can freeze solid and come back, he is not hibernating."
I went to the workroom to get a plastic cup to scoop Mo out of his bowl so as not to clog the burial receptacle with fish rocks.
As I was walking back my co-worker yelped and cried, "He just moved!"
I shook the bowl, and his gills flapped. I was thrilled. My own Halloween Miracle.
And then he kind of slid sideways to the bottom of the bowl.
This is not a miracle. This is a replay of the death of my Great Grandfather. The joy you take from tiny upturns in a fatally ill person's health. The belief that they can pull through that will only result in eventual disappointment.
My fish is 4. Bettas live to two years, absolute tops.
And now I get to watch him suffer and finally die.

Exterminate!

Best pumpkin ever: The Dalek Pumpkin.

















In other Dr. Who news, I was listening to KEXP last week and they played a song called Doctorin' the Tardis, by the Timelords. It's on iTunes. It is HIGHLY recommended- if you are a colossal dork. Which, uhm, if you are reading my blog, you are a colossal dork.

No sex in the champagne room.

I've been pondering freedom a lot lately.
Now I will be the first person to say that it is your right to be an asshole. But were is the point when we decide that hate speech is more egregious? We just make up levels of offense-- even God sees all sin as equal. Sometimes voters stand up in a majority and say "as for me I say this is wrong." But is that ok? Things like abortion, hate speech, whatever's the issue of the day. Majority is supposed to rule. But where do I get off saying that saying assholic things about gay people is a criminal offense? When you vote like that, you dictate for everyone.

There is a new referendum being voted upon here in Seattle. It regards strip clubs and permissible activities therein. It will force clubs to use brighter lights, eliminate champagne rooms and lap dances and put forth new location and license restrictions. There is already a ban on alcohol in strip clubs here. This law is obviously designed to shut down strip clubs in Seattle.

Now on one hand, I feel that it is everyone's right to go out and look at boobs, if said boobs are willingly displayed. Additionally, I know that some strippers are working this job to make money to support children etc. and couldn't make as much elsewhere. (Though I must say, if this weren't the last resort, some other thing would fill the void-- hopefully something not in the sex trade.)

On the other hand, I know that I don't want a strip club opening up on my block. When I lived in Lake City, up the street from the club, it wasn't just the club. It was the drunks coming and going to the clubs, the police calls, the brawls etc. that were the problem. I've noticed on Highway 99 that the different little towns all have different laws on casinos and strip clubs. The areas of 99 that are within city limits of towns that allow strip clubs and casinos are gross. Their business is limited to car dealerships. The towns that don't allow it have sit-down restaurants and grocery stores.

Furthermore, while I would like to believe that dancers just dance, I know that this is not the case. According to numerous sources, including the strippers I have befriended at the local coffee joint, illegal sex-acts occur all the time at strip clubs. On top of that, there was the huge scandal about club owners using profits to illegally influence lawmaking. None of which makes me particularly disposed towards these clubs.

Is it ethical for me to vote yes on this referendum if I am voting yes to protect and rehabilitate neighborhoods in the city that I love even if it is at the expense of workers in the sex-trade and those who enjoy their services (meaning people who, for the most part, I don't give a damn about)?

I have completed every other vote on my ballot, so if you have an opinion, I'd love to hear it.

Here is a recent Seattle Times article about the controversy.

Snuffy-esque.

I have a cold from all the huggy-smoochy garbage at the funeral last week, hence the lowered blog output. Sorry!


Numbered thoughts:
1. Madonna is an idiot. I can't believe she stole a baby. She is so digusting.
2. I caught an interesting story out of Canada this morining, I thought I would share.

Postal staff walk off job to show ire at AIDS tract
Anti-gay pamphlets shouldn't be delivered because they're hate speech, union says
ROBERT MATAS

VANCOUVER -- Vancouver postal workers are willing to tough it out through sleet, hail, snow and fog to deliver the mail. But even on a mild day, they will not handle what they consider homophobic hate literature.

Sixty postal workers at an east Vancouver substation walked off the job yesterday, refusing to process a 27-page booklet distributed this week across Canada by the Fundamental Baptist Mission of Waterford, Ont. They returned to work 15 minutes later, saying they received assurances that Canada Post would review the matter.

"It's a basic principle -- you don't deliver hate literature," Ken Mooney, president of the Vancouver local of the Canadian Union of Postal Workers, said in an interview.

But Canada Post later refused to acknowledge that workers had walked out or that officials would review the policy on mail delivery.

"They did not walk out; they were taking a break. That is what we are calling it," Lillian Au, communications manager for Canada Post's Pacific region, said in an interview. "They are entitled to two 15-minute coffee breaks and after they took their break, they came back and continued to work. We do not consider that to be a walkout."

Canada Post will deliver the pamphlet, Ms. Au also said. "It did not go out [Thursday] but it will be going out. Our commitment to the client, the sender, is that we have a three-day window to deliver that piece of mail. . . . It is business as usual."

Rev. Sterling Clark, a Baptist pastor for almost 60 years, wrote most of the booklet at the centre of the controversy. The front-page headline on The Prophetic Word, which provoked the protest, reads: The Plague of this 21st Century: The Consequences of the sin of Homosexuality (AIDS).

The article holds homosexuality responsible for the deaths for AIDS victims and social problems related to AIDS. An editorial in the booklet states that homosexuals are not nation-builders because they do not have children "and thereby contribute to the death of a nation." (I think they'd better off banning school if they want to promote a population boom.)

Mr. Clark, 77, dismissed the allegation that he had written a piece of homophobic hate literature. "What do they mean by hate? Is it a matter they do not agree with? Is it coming down to, you have one point of view and I have another, and that is classified as hate?" Mr. Clark said in an interview.

He did not retreat from the message of his booklet. He said AIDS is a plague sweeping the world that can be stopped by people honouring monogamous relationships between husband and wife.

He said that homosexuality was responsible for the problems caused by AIDS because homosexuals were responsible for the start of AIDS.

Mr. Clark said he wrote the booklet to draw attention to the fact that the Black Death in the 14th century was caused by fleas, rats and rodents, but AIDS was caused by people and their lifestyle. He wanted to say that so many people are dead and dying from AIDS because they lead an unhealthy lifestyle and that the AIDS "plague" points to a prophetic fulfilment of Scripture about the second coming of Jesus Christ.

Mr. Mooney, of the postal union, said the booklet is a diatribe against the gay community, blaming homosexuals for the demise of Western civilization. Postal workers wanted to take a stand against the distribution of the material. "We have a lot of gay members in the work force. I have a gay brother; most of us know someone who has died from AIDS," he said. "Maybe your son died of AIDS and you are going to get this. It is so offensive."

Mr. Mooney said he believes the line between freedom of expression and hate literature is clear. "Circumstances and facts surrounding each case are going to dictate the outcome. But as a business, I think Canada Post has a social responsibility to take a stand on this," he said. "For a few bucks, they have entered into delivery for hate mail. Why?"

Canada Post may ensure the material is delivered, he added. But the mail will not be delivered by union members. It could be by an outside contractors or supervisors, he said.

Ms. Au said Canada Post does not intend to back down.

"We recognize people have opinions, but if they have an issue with this particular piece of mail, they should direct their concerns to the author of the piece, the sender, or take it up with the police," she said. "We don't have the right to censor the mail."

Canada Post reviews mail for safety reasons to ensure it does not pose a threat to workers and to determine whether the size is suitable for delivery by a postal workers. It also checks whether mail includes sexually explicit images.

"As far as whether it is hate mail, we don't look at that. It's not part of our mandate," Ms. Au said.

Jason Gratl, president of the B.C. Civil Liberties Association, said the booklet should not be distributed if the material is hate literature as defined by federal law. "Employees should not be required by their employers to commit crimes," he said.

"As much as we don't like the idea of Canada Post screening the contents of the material they distribute, it is probably a good idea to determine whether or not the material constitutes a criminal offence," Mr. Gratl also said. However, he had not seen the booklet and declined to express an opinion on whether it could be considered hate literature.

Daaaaa dum. Daaaa dum. Daaa dum. Dadum. Dadum Dadum.

For those who need even more cuteness.

Let me explain cute.

Dear email forwarding middle-aged ladies at work,
Let me assist you with something.

This is cute:





















This is unsanitary:















Please don't send me pictures of animals licking objects that people plan to put in their orifices.

Thanks!

Still only half as scary as CatBus.

I think whoever photoshopped this doesn't know how to spell Cthulhu in Japanese... what a loser.

Expiration Date

Shoreline Community College is having a Silent Auction and a screening of the award winning independant film “Expiration Date.” The writer/director, Rick Stevenson, will be in attendance for questions and answers. There will be food, beverages and great stuff to bid on.

DATE:

November 7, 2006

TIME:

3:30 to 7:00 for the Silent Auction

7:00 to 9:00 for the movie “Expiration Date”

WHERE:

Shoreline Community College in the Theatre

16101 Greenwood Ave North

Shoreline, WA

Happy Mole Day to you!

6.02E23
October 23 from 6:02 to 6:02.

Giggle Loop.

I am an inappropriate laugher. I laugh in horror movies during eviscerations. I laugh in church. I laugh when couples are arguing.
Now just imagine I am at my uncle's funeral. Imagine I am gazing serenely at the pastor, then my brows gently furrowing as the musical playlist begins.

Two Elvis spirituals.

The Beatles, Let it be.

and then... Eric Clapton's reggae inspired rendition of the Bob Dylon's Knockin' on Heaven's Door.

Ma, take this badge off of me.
I can't use it any more.
It's getting dark, too dark to see.
Feel like I'm knockin' on heaven's door.

Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door.

Ma, take these guns away from me.
I can't shoot them any more.
There's a long black cloud following me.
Feel like I'm knockin' on heaven's door.

Look at the ground!!!!! Look at the coffin!! Your uncle is dead! Do not look at David. Do not look at anyone.

And finally SNORT!

Cosmic Rays Strike Again!

Cosmic Rays Linked to Global Warming
By Sara Goudarzi
LiveScience Staff Writer
posted: 23 October 2006
06:26 am ET

Earth's recent warming trend might in part be due to a lack of starlight reaching our planet, a new study suggests. But other scientists are not so sure.

According to a theory proposed a decade ago, when a star explodes far away in the Milky Way, cosmic rays—high-speed atomic particles—go through the Earth’s atmosphere and produce ions and free electrons.

The released electrons act as catalysts and accelerate the formation of small clusters of sulfuric acid and water molecules, the building blocks of clouds. Therefore, cosmic rays would increase cloud cover on Earth, reflecting sunlight and keeping the planet relatively cool.

However, because the Sun’s magnetic field—which shields the Earth from these rays—doubled in intensity during the last century, there has been a reduction in cloudiness, a possible contributor to Earth’s warming.

Scientists at the Danish National Space Center mimicked chemistry of the lower atmosphere in a large reaction chamber. They created a mixture that contained gasses at realistic concentrations and used an ultraviolet lamp to act as the Sun.

Microscopic droplets, precursor to clouds, started floating in the air of the reaction chamber.

We were amazed by the speed and efficiency with which the electrons do their work of creating the building blocks for the cloud condensation nuclei,” said team leader Henrik Svensmark, Director of the Center for Sun-Climate Research at the Danish National Space Center. “This is a completely new result within climate science.”

The results however, may not transfer to natural conditions outside the controlled laboratory environment.

“Studies that have evaluated the claims that global cloud cover is related to changes in cosmic rays find that if you re-examine this matter outside of the brief period which they used, the relationship falls apart,” said Raymond Bradley director of the Climate System Research Center at the University of Massachusetts. Bradley was not involved with the study.

The researchers agree that further study is needed to estimate the contribution of this mechanism to the recent warming of the Earth’s atmosphere and oceans.

This work does not mean that there is no human influence on climate, Svensmark told LiveScience. “But it might be necessary to revaluate the climate sensitivity to carbon dioxide.”

The study was detailed online this month in the Proceedings of the Royal Society A.

I struggled to come up with some kind of Fantastic Four meets Republican propeganda joke, (Ha! Invisible Unwed Mothers etc.) but screw it. I am too damn tired.

Goodbye Blog, Hello Cthulhu

I am going to be out of town to organize and attend my uncle's memorial service. I probably will not update my blog until Monday.

In my absence, I leave you in the capable tentacles of Cthulhu.

















I, for one, would like a cookie.

Something fishy...

Man sentenced in Ind. for killing family
By TOM COYNE, Associated Press Writer Tue Oct 17, 2:13 PM ET

SOUTH BEND, Ind. - A judge Tuesday sentenced a minister's son to 160 years in prison for killing his father, stepmother and two stepsisters so he could attend his high school prom in 1989.

St. Joseph Superior Court Judge Roland Chamblee Jr. sentenced Jeffrey Pelley, 34, to four consecutive 40-year sentences in the shotgun slayings of his minister-father and the others at the family's parsonage.

Investigators said Pelley was angry at his father for grounding him just before the LaVille High School prom. After the killings, they said, Pelley cleaned up and went to the dance.

Pelley continued to maintain his innocence during Tuesday's hearing.

"I loved my family dearly and I have lived my life trying to pattern my life after my father," Pelley said through heavy sobs. "I would not, I could not and I did not do this."

His attorneys said he will appeal.

Pelley wasn't charged until 2002, when the case was reinvestigated. He was living in Dade City, Fla., when he was arrested.

A St. Joseph County jury found him guilty July 21 in the shooting deaths of his father, the Rev. Robert Pelley, 38; his stepmother, Dawn Pelley, 32; and stepsisters, Janel, 8, and Jolene, 6. They were killed in the parsonage adjacent to the Olive Branch Church of the United Brethren in Lakeville, about 10 miles south of South Bend.

Pelley's sister, Jacque Delp, who was not home at the time of the shootings, testified on his behalf.

"He is one of the most kind and compassionate people I know," she said.

Pelley's attorneys had argued during his trial that there wasn't enough time for him to have killed his family, cleaned up and still made it to the LaVille High School prom. They also said no one could commit such a gruesome attack and still act "normal" during the prom events, as his friends testified during the trial.

The defense also questioned the decision by investigators not to look for fingerprints at the crime scene. Police officers testified during the trial that they didn't think they would find any usable prints and they thought it would be a waste of time because Pelley was their main suspect.

The shotgun used in the killings was never found.

wider but not deeper

I've put on a wee bit of weight since my foot injury of stupidity and I was a bit concerned about what I should wear to my uncle's memorial this weekend. I didn't want to show up there looking like a three pound sausage in a 2 pound casing. But I noticed that when I tried on appropriate outfits I looked like a kindergarten teacher.
Why is it that standing in front of thirty 5 year-olds and standing in front of a dead person requires the same ensemble?

I got nuthin.

Sorry about the silence. I've been pretty busy with family things.

Some deep thoughts:

1. I recieved a postcard from buddy and expert christmas tree carrier, Charles that shows a cat with its mouth full and has a long sentence in German. It says something about finding a bird according to a coworker. I have hung it in my cubical.
Hopefully it doesn't say anything about cocks.

2. Recent circumstances have dramatically increased my interest in dog ownership. However, in order to own a dog I need to live within 10 minutes of work (to take him out at mid-day) or I need to have a yard. Unfortunately, this means I would have to live in Lynnwood. Which would be fine, except that I would have to live in Lynnwood.
In order to stay in Seattle and have a yard, I would have to marry an old rich man and have him killed or make more money. However, if I make more money I am at work longer and now the dog is alone in the yard 12 hours a day.
Anyone know any rich old men with heart conditions?

3. Sting has released a lute music album. Dustin Diamond has released a porn video. Why is the world all fucked up?

4. This a bird eating a waffle.

Not enough time.

When I was 6 I broke my leg. It was a bad break and I had a cast from my toes to my hip. Uncle Brett came to Post Falls to visit, and I remember he picked me up and held me in the air. I had never been so high off the ground.

He was irritatingly smart. He could tell you the common and scientific names of any animal. He could tell you where it lives, what it does, what it eats. Sometimes I thought he knew everything. He was insufferable to play against in Trivial Pursuit.

He was an emotional person. A person who had made a million mistakes and held each one in his heart. A million regrets can fit in their too.

He passed away a few days ago, suddenly and alone in his apartment. We didn’t find out until last night. Telling my mother that her big brother had died was the worst thing that I’ve ever had to do.

Before he died he kept making plans with me and then literally sleeping through them. I kept falling for it and I was mad at myself for being such an idiot.

And I’m mad at myself now. I feel like I blew him off, but I didn’t.

I think maybe I feel bad that he felt so strongly for me and I don’t know what to say about "my other uncle."

"Hollywood Star Dogs" is a big fat ripoff!!!!

Saban returns to roots with kids' shows venture
Thu Oct 12, 6:01 PM ET

Media tycoon Haim Saban, who built his fortune from the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, unveiled a new venture to develop family programs starting with a live-action troupe of dogs performing classic fairy tales.

Saban's Los Angeles-based private equity firm Saban Capital Group Inc. said on Tuesday it would create a virtual studio that employs freelance producers, writers and artists to fund programming that can travel across different delivery systems, including video games, mobile devices and broadcast TV.

"I am thrilled to return to my roots and focus on developing media properties for children and families," Saban said in a statement.

The first project, 26 half-hour episodes of "Hollywood Star Dogs," will be unveiled at a gathering of international television executives next week in the south of France.

The Saban Entertainment Group venture also has signed a deal to work with Singapore-based animation studio Tiny Island Animation to develop computer-generated programs.

A self-professed cartoon peddler, Saban converted 1,500 hours of children's television programming into a joint venture with Fox Entertainment, which was later sold to Walt Disney Co. for about $3 billion.

Saban had earlier secured the rights to the Power Rangers, which became a hit series in the mid-1990s with accompanying best-selling action figures in the United States.

He now owns German broadcaster ProSiebenSat.1 with a group of other investors and is buying Spanish-language U.S. broadcaster Univision Communications Inc.

Uhm, doesn't anyone else remember Wishbone?















The little dog with a big imagination?



















That show absolutely rocked.




















He did all the classics in literature. There are about 50 more ridiculously adorable pictures I could put up. Wishbone rules! Forever!

Seriously, this Saban guy is a total idea thieving ass-clown (Steve). I can't believe anyone watched his stupid power rangers show (Steve). I can't believe that people who watched his show and knew all the ranger's names and colors couldn't manage to name every villain listed on the sheet at quiz night (Steve).
I also can't believe that the African American ranger was the black ranger and the Asian American ranger was the yellow ranger.

Saban, if an angry woman and a Jack Russel Terrier come to your door, I suggest you keep it bolted.

Are you under 27? Do you own a uterus?

There is now a vaccine to prevent HPV (Human Papilloma Virus) in young women.
HPV is very common and can be very serious. HPV causes cervical cancer, vaginal and vulval lesions, and genital warts.
You cannot get HPV from the vaccine and the only possible side effects involve fever or allergic reaction. It is a series of 3 shots. You need to be under 27 years of age. If you have insurance, it should be free.
Nobody likes shots, but I'm guessing that 3 shots is a bit less uncomfortable than cancer, lesions on your hoohaw, or genital warts.
Gardasil. Ask your doctor.

I enjoy being a girl.

Having fasted for 15 hours, peed in a cup, endured a cholesterol pinprick, hearing my weight, having 2 shots, and the removal of 5 vials of blood, calling me a wuss during my pap, was a bit much for me.

Let me ask you, Lady Doctor, do they make a larger set of cooch attacking hardware? Do they also make them colder? That would be great.

No amount of relaxing, is going to make this less awkward. I don’t really like strangers tinkering with my lady machinery. Least of all 55 year old women with giant forceps (is that what you call those?). I assure you that no penis is quite that large-- not that I’m taking an international survey. I promise my lady bits are most unfamiliar with being peered and prodded at anxiously by cold metal probe wielding strangers (in spite of my serial dating) and women (even though I did go to Bryn Mawr).

Yes, Lady Doctor, I do recognize that my snoosh could probably fit, oh say, a guinea pig and a junior league soccer ball. However, I am not about to join the Rodent Junior Athletics League. Your kind suggestion that perhaps I should put more things up there more often will be carefully considered before rejection. I am not suffering from a psychological problem having to do with being touched in the crotchal region. I am just 4 days away from my waxing appointment and shy about strangers fussing about in my stuff. I am certainly not used to having bachellorette party prop size tongs in my cooter.

So once a year I get to be a pansy as long as it involves giant metal tongs, strangers, and my hoohaw. And you will just have to live with it.

Thanks,

q.

I think the important thing is that when men fight they always rip off their shirts, right?

Actors see red on 'Grey's Anatomy' set
By SANDY COHEN, AP Entertainment Writer Wed Oct 11, 10:54 PM ET

LOS ANGELES - Doctor doctor, give us the news. But ABC is staying mum about the reported on-set scuffle between the actors portraying Dr. McDreamy and Dr. Burke on TV's top-rated "Grey's Anatomy."

An argument between Isaiah Washington and Patrick Dempsey got physical and led to a temporary pause in production, the New York Daily News reported in its Wednesday editions.

The actors shared a heated exchange Monday about cast members delaying a scene when Washington, 43, grabbed Dempsey, 40, by the throat and shoved him, according to the newspaper.

Representatives for the actors said the two have made amends.

"Differences are inevitable," Washington's publicist, Cynthia Snyder, said in a statement. "They were aired, resolved and everyone has moved on."

Dempsey's spokeswoman echoed that sentiment: "There was an argument on set. In any close-knit family, sometimes people argue. But everybody made up and went back to work."

On-set arguments are common, said TV historian Tim Brooks, co-author of "The Complete Directory to Prime Time Network and Cable TV Shows."

"Diva-like conduct is certainly not unusual," he said. "You have a lot of egos there, and you have a lot of creative people who think they're more creative than the other."

"Moonlighting," which aired from 1985 to 1989, was famous for its fighting on set, Brooks said. More recently, rumors of on-set animosity dogged ABC's "Desperate Housewives" and The WB's "Charmed."

But physical violence "is pretty unusual," he said, adding that anything that harms an actor's appearance could affect their work.

"Dr. McDreamy needs his cheekbones," Brooks said. "Real violence can lead to fictional violence that can end your job."

Now in its third season, "Grey's Anatomy" has been the No. 1 show in the Nielsen ratings for two of the new season's three weeks. The romantic medical drama centers on the personal and professional lives of surgeons and interns at the fictional Seattle Grace hospital. Besides Dempsey and Washington, the show stars Sandra Oh, Katherine Heigl and Ellen Pompeo.

The show earned 11 Emmy nominations this year, including one for best drama, and won the prize for outstanding casting. It was also nominated for three Golden Globe awards and Oh won for best supporting actress.

Oh silly boys! No need to fight over me, there is plenty to go around. I have been running a small survey regarding which is cuter, Isaiah Washington or Patrick Dempsey. I didn't mean for it to go so far. Seriously though, I can't imagine this happening in the workplace. "No, the TPS reports will go out Monday!" Quiana screeched leaping across the cubical to grab Gargoyle Toes by the neck and shoving her through a mysteriously convenient pane of glass.

A break from North Korea

Don't ask me, I just typed 'waffle' into Google Images.

Good times, good times.

Quit pestering us!

NY Times article on the Korean response to possible UN sanctions. I can't find actual text of this one anywhere!

Headlines from state run North Korean news:

DPRK's Readiness to Boost Ties of Cooperation with International Community Reiterated

Papers Call for Demonstrating Songun Korea's Dignity and Might

Floral Baskets Placed before Statues of Kim Il Sung

Sri Lankan Preparatory Committee Inaugurated

Korean People's Efforts to Settle Issue of Korea by Themselves Supported

Film Show at Cuban Embassy

7th National Computer Program Exhibition in Field of Education Held

Foreign Delegations Arrive

President of Senegal Sends Floral Basket to Statue of Kim Il Sung

KCNA News

More North Korean fun!

Here is a very interesting/funny article about why North Korean press releases are so unintentionally hilarious.

Kim Jong-il Says the Darnedest Things: The extra-large propaganda machine of the DPRK.

Clarification

South Korea and North Korea: totally not the same.
Ban Ki-Moon is a South Korean diplomat; so everyone caterwauling about how we shouldn't be indulging Korea by giving them an important UN post is a complete idiot.
Pass it along!

Big words aren't always better.

This was the official North Korean statement regarding the alleged nuclear test.

"The field of scientific research in the DPRK successfully conducted an underground nuclear test under secure conditions on October 9, 2006, at a stirring time when all the people of the country are making a great leap forward in the building of a great, prosperous, powerful socialist nation.

''It has been confirmed that there was no such danger as radioactive emission in the course of the nuclear test as it was carried out under scientific consideration and careful calculation.

''The nuclear test was conducted with indigenous wisdom and technology 100 percent. It marks a historic event as it greatly encouraged and pleased the KPA and people that have wished to have powerful self-reliant defense capability.

''It will contribute to defending the peace and stability on the Korean Peninsula and in the area around it.''

Yes, I read Space.com.

'Star Trek' Starship Fetches Over $500,000 in Auction
By The Associated Press
posted: 09 October 2006 10:29 am ET

NEW YORK (AP) – Starfleet Capt. Jean-Luc Picard commanded it. Now some Trekkie owns it.

A model of the Starship Enterprise used in the pilot and title sequences of “Star Trek: The Next Generation'' sold for $576,000 Saturday at an auction of costumes, sets and props from 40 years of the “Star Trek'' sci-fi franchise.

The 78-inch-long (198-centimeter) miniature of the “Enterprise-D,'' built by Industrial Light and Magic, debuted in 1987 in the episode “Encounter at Farpoint,'' and then was used in many subsequent episodes, as well as the film “Star Trek Generations.''

More than 1,000 items from the archives of CBS Paramount Television Studios went on the block over three days at Christie's auction house, and fans forked over a total of $7.1 million for set furniture, pointy Vulcan ears and other props.

Some Christie's employees taking bids by telephone wore Star Trek uniforms, and a live feed of the auction was carried on the History Channel's Web site.

Other top sellers from Saturday's auction included a spacesuit belonging to the series' Dr. McCoy from the episode “The Tholian Web,'' which fetched $144,000; and a replica of Captain James T. Kirk's chair on the bridge in the first Star Trek series.

The painted wood chair was only a re-creation for a 1996 episode of “Star Trek: Deep Space Nine'' that mixed action from that newer series with old footage, but it still sold for $62,400.

I don't think that the Bulgarian police understand the Twilight Zone.

Gravely ill woman kills son, is freed, kills husband
Tue Oct 10, 9:48 AM EST

SOFIA (Reuters) - A Bulgarian woman who killed her son was released from prison because of terminal cancer. She then went home and killed her husband, police said Tuesday.

The 57-year-old was sentenced to 15 years in jail for killing her 29-year-old son with a garden hoe in April 2005 while he was sleeping.

Last month, authorities judged her to be in the final stages of cancer and let her go home, where she stabbed her husband in the throat with a knife.

"It was established she was in the last stage of cancer, she had it all over her body," said a spokeswoman for the Bourgas regional police.

"They presumed she was feeling bad and she would treat herself and rest. But nothing of the kind. She got aggressive and ... she killed her husband."

The woman, from a village in eastern Bulgaria, has been taken into custody again and is awaiting a new trial.

"She threatened that, if she is released again, she will kill her second son as well," the police spokeswoman said.

"The whole case is like something from the twilight zone."

Yea, just like the Twilight Zone. You released a murderer and they murdered again. Go figure.
Also, not that Bulgaria is high on my list to relocate to, but you can brutally murder your own son with a garden hoe and you get 15 years of prison. What do you have to do to get life?

Driving Lessons #1

So, just a FYI for drivers:
Three reasons to use your parking or "emergency" brake.

1. You will ruin your car.
When you put your car in park the entire weight of your car rests on a small metal pin, which can bend or break and between repairing the damages from your car smashing into crap, and repairing the pin from the intestines of your vehicle, it will cost you a bit of cash. The pin will eventually break especially if you are in a hurry and the momentum of your car is against that pin all the time.

2. You will ruin my car.
When you parallel park on a low hill in front of my car, slowly, preventing me from pulling out by adjusting your distance between my car and the car in front of you numerous times, then park with out using your parking break, you will roll back into my car, or roll back and block me in.

3. You will make me ruin your car.
If you block me in and I know you did't set your emergency break I will happily use my scuffed bumper to push your formerly unscuffed car out of my way. This will also cause your vehicle to roll back onto the pin, stressing it again.

Something Negative

The last pannel of this Something Positive comic reminds me very strongly of a friend of mine; and the way she treated her boyfriend, who by the way, actually decided to marry her.

They'll be there for you.

Yes, gentle readers that is Jon Bon Jovi and former President Bill Clinton.

Bon Jovi to Restore Rundown Philly Homes
FRIDAY OCTOBER 06, 2006 08:55AM
By Stephen M. Silverman

Jon Bon Jovi on Thursday announced an effort to renovate 15 rundown houses in Philadelphia's blighted north side.

With Bill Clinton by his side, the Bon Jovi singer, 44, introduced the Phase V Homeownership Project before a crowd of about 350 people in Philadelphia.

The effort is sponsored by Bon Jovi's Philadelphia Soul Charitable Foundation and the Saturn car company, working in conjunction with Project HOME and Habitat for Humanity – and Bon Jovi said Clinton was on board as well.

The former president, 60, "was intrigued enough that he offered his services, and said, 'If I can help you in any way, don't hesitate.' And we didn't," Bon Jovi told the Associated Press.

Clinton told the audience, "I don't care who is running the government and what the policies are, there will always be a gap between where we are and where we need to be, and those of you out there in the audience have to step into that gap," the Philadelphia Inquirer reports.

Thursday night, Clinton and former president George H.W. Bush were honored at the 2006 Liberty Medal ceremony at Philadelphia's National Constitution Center. At the same event, Bon Jovi received the City of Brotherly Love Award from Mayor John F. Street.

Never trust any creature with more than 4 legs.

Spider causes man to lose control of SUV
Thu Oct 5, 5:29 PM ET

LEVANT, Maine - A Levant man told police he lost control of his 2003 Lincoln Navigator after he was startled by a spider on Wednesday morning.

James Lee, 28, was trying to get out of the SUV when it smashed into a tree. He walked away with a bloody nose caused by the air bag.

But, it could've been worse. At least it wasn't the new Volvo XC90 he won in a contest.

Last month, Lee was one of 11 people from across the country to win a new vehicle from McDonald's, the Bangor Daily News reported. After finishing a Big Mac extra value meal, he got the winning game piece for the "Pirates of the Caribbean" game.

He hasn't taken delivery of the new vehicle yet.

When I saw the headline I didn't think that this was "oddly enough" material, because I would totally have an accident if there was a spider in my car; but I'm quite amused by the end of the article. I feel they should have tried to work the word 'booty' into the headline though.

Sheetzucacapoopoo

That's all I've go to say.

So, in a fit of uncharacteristic kindness I decided to wash the sheets of my current dogsitting client's bed. This way when they came back from Europe they would have a fresh clean bed.
Well, I threw a pillowcase in with a bunch of towels, ran the load and somehow managed to utterly destroy the pillow case. I have never destroyed something in someone else's house except a glass once and I felt VERY bad about the case.
So I dragged Cathi out on an emergency must find the pillowcase run.

Cathi and I arrive at Macy's and actually found the pillowcase immediately. Yay!

Unfortunately they come in sets of two. Boo!

Luckily for me they were on sale. Yay!

Unlucky for me they were on sale for a bargain 69$. Mother fucker.

Who owns 99$ pillowcases? I'll tell you who: Quincy's parents. Really though, I am just happy that I was able to replace them.

Sigh.

125

Today is Melody's last day in the office.














Angie, Lynn, Angela, Annie, and I decided to send her off with a bang.














So we booked a conference room and prepared for "Operation, Bitch, Sit Down! You Ain't Goin Anywhere!" Then when she left for lunch, like ninja's we struck.



















But we were dissapointed with 50. Only two garbage bags? Not enough!!
















No, we needed more. So we bought more. 100 was still not enough.














125. Yes, that was enough.

Cher is a ho.

This is an outfit that Cher is auctioning off; it is called "Rock and Roll Outfit."
I would call it a "Transvestite Biker Prostitute Outfit."
Also, since when is undies, a leather jacket, and saddle stockings an "outfit?"

No, really, I'm just happy to see you.

Police: Men smuggled monkeys in pants; also leopard cubs, orchids, birds of paradise

By Lisa Sweetingham, Court TV Tue Sep 19, 5:42 PM ET

LOS ANGELES (Court TV) - When the rare birds of paradise escaped from his suitcase and flew over the heads of U.S. Customs Agents at Los Angeles International Airport, Robert Cusack decided it was best to confess that, yes, he did have more to declare.

"I have monkeys in my pants," Cusack told the agents.

Cusack, 49, had just gotten off a plane from Thailand and was immediately taken into custody.

Two endangered slow loris pygmy monkeys were rescued from Cusack's underwear.

For attempting to smuggle four birds of paradise, two lorises and 50 rare orchids into the United States on June 13, 2002, Cusack served five and a half months in prison and paid $1,200 in fines.

But Cusack wasn't alone.

His traveling companion, Chris Edward Mulloy, allegedly sneaked two newborn Asian leopard cats past the customs agents.

Authorities believe Mulloy, 45, hid the felines in hand-carried luggage, checked into a nearby hotel, and called his sister Darlah Kaye Mulloy to ask for her help in getting rid of the contraband cats.

On Monday, Chris Mulloy was arrested by federal authorities in Palm Springs on four counts of illegally importing wildlife, receiving, concealing and transporting wildlife, and making false statements to the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service.

He will be arraigned next week and faces up to 20 years in prison if convicted of all charges.

Darlah Mulloy, 48, has not been arrested, but was named along with her brother in a February grand jury indictment on two counts of illegally receiving, concealing, and transporting wildlife, and attempting to obstruct justice and tamper with a witness.

Authorities said they were aided by a tipster in their four-year investigation.

A spokesman from the U.S. Attorney's off ice, Thom Mrozek, says Darlah Mulloy's son gave one of the leopards to a former girlfriend, who lives in Foothill Ranch, Orange County.

"She still has it. It's kind of skittish. She's been caring for it for three years now so we don't want to disturb it more than necessary," Mrozek said, adding that they are currently searching for a suitable - and legal - home for the wildcat.

The other leopard cat journeyed from Mulloy's luggage to a friend who was unable to care for it, and ultimately on to the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service in Texas, where Mrozek says it is being cared for by a wildlife facility.

The lorises, Mrozek says, found a home at the Los Angeles County Zoo. But the four birds of paradise all died.

"That is a not uncommon result of wildlife smuggling," Mrozek said. "These animals die all the time because of the stress of being stuffed into a box and smuggled in. The birds, I think it was the stress of the very long travel and who knows what kind of shape they were in."

While Cusack's monkey-in-pants method might seem bizarre, it's not so far-fetched.

"We had a guy who did it with snakes about eight or nine years ago coming in from Mexico," Mrozek says. "You name it, it's been done."

Smuggling rare animals and plants into the country undermines conservation efforts, and the potential economic and ecological consequences can be devastating, Mrozek says.

"In some cases, we're talking about animals that potentially carry diseases like avian flu," Mrozek says. "We did a case a number of years ago in which animals were affected with Exotic Newcastle disease - and that can wipe out an entire industry."

They've also confiscated snakeheads - a type of top-predator fish that can live for short periods on land.

"They will eat everything, so they will decimate the ecology of any body of water they're in," Mrozek says. "There are all kinds of potentially extraordinary problems we face with wildlife smuggling."

Honestly, I am just frustrated that the headline implied that ALL of the animals were in his pants at once and they weren't.

And as for those "slow" loris monkeys, I can't help but feel those little guys were moving pretty fast.

Incidentally, I heard this story on Wait, Wait... Don't Tell Me and in order to find the text I typed the following into Google: "monkeys in my pants news" I might add that when I typed "monkeys in my pants" I did NOT find the news article.

Final thought: How the hell did I miss this when it happened?

Super busy weekend

Last weekend I was so extremely busy.
Friday, Quincy and I had a playdate with my favorite dog-sitting client, Theo. Quincy had a great time romping about with Theo and using his skills of cuteness to beg tennis balls off of the sentimental fellows at the courts.















Saturday, Melody and I caught a Mariners game, then got a beer, then had dinner at Chutney's in Cap Hill, then had cocktails. The game was great, the food was great. Very similar to love.











Later in the evening Theo's parents and I went to see Bombay Dreams at the 5th Ave. Theater. The show was very cute. My favorite part of the show was a very inebriated fellow who would whoop and yell at innappropriate intervals. As time progressed he would yell exciting comments, such as "slut" and "get over it."
I was amazed that the staff didn't bounce him. He could barely walk down the steps.


















Sunday Jeni and I attended a Mariner's game as well. It was a great game, but I left there so full of pulled pork and shishkaberries that I had to waddle home.














Later that night I watched The Testament of Dr. Mabuse with my uncle.
Amazing. Just great. If you haven't seen this movie, shame on you. Fritz Lang's film making was amazing especially considering that he made the film in the 30's.