global existence of penises continues to threaten feminists

*WARNING* Potentially deadly rant below. Blame NPR, they’ve got me all riled up today.

Bryn Mawr is going to withdraw my diploma for this but, as I listen to news coverage about the recent appointment of a man as the Chair of Women’s Studies at the University of Washington, I can’t help but feel that the whole thing is appallingly fitting. Does everybody actually believe that one must be a woman to study women? Do herpetologists need forked tongues? Well I guess you can never understand the nature of snake-ness without being a snake…?

Women’s Studies is not really about the question “what does it mean to be a woman?” Women’s studies is about learning and documenting things having to do with women, a group historically ignored. Can I write a book illustrating what it is like to be an American, what American-ness is? Of course not. People are different; people have different experiences and different natures. What is it that these people are really implying: that a man can never understand women? No shit. That men and women are different? Yea, I noticed that in Junior High. Nope, they are asserting that no member of the privileged male gender can empathize with the ‘subjugated woman.’ How about a guy who didn’t get a job because he was Mexican, or too old, or gay, or short? Nope, Women’s Studies is a snatch only club. Sorry guys, no willies allowed.

Apparently the possibility that men and women are both capable of doing the same level of work is not part of feminism anymore. The kind of drivel I heard touted as feminism at Bryn Mawr was apparently not the rants of women with senses of entitlement larger than the state of Texas and mouths large enough to swallow a Princess cruise ship, but mainstream feminism today.

These are the same people who believe that only white people are racist. You want to see widespread commonly accepted racism? Be white and move to Japan or any crap neighborhood in Philadelphia. My male friends are more “Feminist” than my female friends and my black relatives are the WORST racists I’ve ever suffered.

I have always believed that the basic premise of feminism is that while men and women are different from each other, that neither gender fits into cookie cutter definitions, and that everyone should be free to do as they believe and desire without gender based constraints.

When women talk about the entitlement of the male patriarchy do they forget the meal they were bought the night before? Do they forget the doors held open for them? How about the being able to act utterly insane and then write it off as hormones?

I guess feminism is about chicks bitching about how men are being treated better while showing a little cleave to get a free beer.

Well, if I’m going to get free beer out of it, “Here’s a toast to our titties ladies.”