Space Links!

Via io9 & MSNBC.

Lovely, Pristine Beaches off the Shores of Titan's Great Methane Lake

Branson's New Virgin Mothership Sneak Peek

RAWR! Shake it Sir Richard Branson!

Link-O-Rama

This is the most disappointing news story ever. Summary: My shower gel is probably giving a sea otter cancer right now. I know that this world is filled with worse troubles, but I LOVE my shower gel. MURRRR.

Interesting article on interracial marriage and rogue legal clerks.

Awesome story on Bruce Wayne on GCN.

Links! Oh boy!

Wanna see some HOT space shuttle processing pix? You know you do, Nerd.


Jezebel brings us a Statistical Guide to Why You're Not Getting Laid. Showing the statistical imbalance between the genders by geographical location. (AKA the chart in National Geographic that my Grammy used to point out that I have no excuse for not having provided her with grandbabies.)
Summary:
If you live in Seattle you are not getting laid because you are either:
1. A dude
2. Utterly useless (see: Quiana)
If you live in New York it is because you are either:
1. A lady-person
2. Not wearing the new Prada Spring Collection.


Rush Limbaugh is a pathetic piece of shit who doesn't deserve a name and who will be roasting in the pits of hell (and judging by his physical condition- rather soon).
RL says that feminists hate men and get 2 0r 3 abortions and that is why they vote for Hillary Clinton.
I know that my hating of men often culminates in huge amounts of unprotected sex. I always fuck that which I hate. (Strange side note: I also hate seafood. Anyone up for an aquarium run?)


Having now slithered through the slime which is RL's uncomplicated, bigoted, misogynistic, drug-addled mind, I think it is time for some Muppets.

You may call me Nerdy VonNerdstress, Queen of the Dorks

Check out this segment of Ellen.

Seriously. It is awesome.

There is a vat of cornstarch and water... that is all you should require.

All the cool kids hate The Five

Butternut Squash.

Link Dump

NPH comments on (future guest star) Britney Spears, replete with a ladybits related snark.

My friend Terry writes about Spitzer.

Tired of political discussions? Next time some obsesses about Obama tell them that you are more concerned about Harvey Dent's political career and have them listened to his impassioned plea for law and order. Then punch them in the face.

Tired Quiana = Link Dump

Proposals one should not accept.

The Bacon Patch

Mother Knows Best.

Parade of Linkage

The author of cuteoverload.com deserves worse than death- but death will just have to do. Why? Because of this.

This video could save your life- via zombiesarecoming.com.

Mother insisted that I bring some whole wheat flour home with me (which she bought thinking it is the same as all-purpose flour and then realized her error) so I've had these in mind.

Link Dump Part Three Zillion

Discovery news has fabulous grasp of the obvious.
News Flash: Universe Still a Mystery

Check out the chalk board on today's Questionable Content.
YUM!

And a bonus non-link item:
This morning my car door handle worked. This is because it is trying to trick me into canceling my appointment at Andy's Auto. This will never work. So there, car.

Link Dump

Deer wrestling ruins sofa.
Because Nature does not respect upholstery.

Accusations of drunken lemur-hood result in a pink slip.
People actually read Dilbert? Who knew?

Snakes in a tree.
What do you want? There is a Christmas tree and inside it there's a snake. This reminds me also of the Chip & Dale cartoon where Donald steels their tree and they plot their revenge.

Ginko Ginko Ginko

How Is a Ginkgo Tree Like a Discarded Computer?
Neat article about Chinese scavenger industries and also smelly fruit. The path between Bryn Mawr and Haverford Colleges was lined in mature female ginkos. Reading about their horrible smell made me reminisce a wee bit.

My new favorite phrase is 'mature female ginkos'.

Good times.

Chi-Chi's of Terror

Here is a very short but interesting blog about abandoned Chi-Chi's Restaurants.

I have no idea why this fascinates me, but it does.

It may be that I like to say Chi-Chi's. It is my favorite restaurant named for euphemisms for breasts.

Sometimes people like taking things out of context, I assume for the purposes of being jerks.

Michelle Collins of BWE should be my new best friend (sorry Steve).
Her awesome blog-post showing our kismet-esque blogging:
Never Gonna Give You Up, Rick Astley!

End of Original Post.

Addendum:
I was recently linked on a website which basically picked this post out of, I would guess dozens (probably more), of similarly titled posts and (in my view) accused me of being a homophobe.

The blog said that Rick Rolling is homophobic (I disagree) and because I did not like the traffic I was getting I changed the title of this entry. I did leave it up because naming your blog title as the line from Family Guy (as an enchanting circular reference to a show that is only based on references- zing!) is not a crime. I think it is hard to say that I am bashing Rick Astley for being gay- particularly when he is not gay and even more difficult to assert if you actually read the post, only to find that it is a link to someone else's post about her unabashed adoration of Rick Astley. It is probably an even weaker assertion if one looks to the bottom of the post to see that it is labeled under the category of "men with whom I would like to make sweet sweet love."

The internet is a forum for free speech and unfortunately some of that freedom includes the right to be a dick.

Sorry SUCkers!

I am both sick and swamped at work. I spend most of my evening hibernating, Yogi-style.

But let me tell you a little story about unprofessional behavior. I totally cried at work yesterday. I had x-million things to do and my boss asked me to do one last completely useless thing and I said, "Ok. No problem," then I hung up the phone and burst into tears.

It was awesome.

Anyway, all is well, but crying at work is not how I like to roll... it just doesn't seem very gangsta.

Here is a quickie link dump for you.

Boy, 6, Tries to Drive to Applebees
Why, of all places Applebees? I guess he just loves there dusty sport memorabilia and potato boats.
I HATE Applebees, I have no idea why anyone would want to go there.

FBI Checks Bomb Report, Finds Pumpkin
Excerpt:
An FBI spokeswoman in Seattle, Robbie Burroughs, says four agents went to Casper's office.... He spent an hour with the agents showing them a pumpkin and another squash similar in size to pieces of the Hiroshima bomb. Burroughs says the agents left satisfied it wasn't dangerous.
I assume he means the pumpkins. Your tax dollars at work kids.

Jimmy Carter: U.S. Tortures Prisoners
Nothing funny here. An interesting read though.

Please don't consider me part of the axis of evil

I'm pondering the parting words of the President of Bolivia from the Daily Show.

I wonder what it is like to come in from a jog, or wake up only to find out that you are a member of the "Axis of Evil." Or to wake up and find out that Kim Jong Il made the list and you didn't.

If make the list (what?! there's still time) I will have to go out and buy a black leather trench coat, the uniform of badass-ary.

In an unrelated note:
Here is a webcomic about working at The Olive Garden.

Child abuse is hi-larious

No, seriously.

Click this link, I implore you. It makes me kind of want to have a child... so I can dress it up as a seal and take it to the polar bear exhibit at the zoo.


Although, now having watched it with the sound minutely on I notice that that is a grown woman. That spoils the whole damn thing.

Sweet Delicious Link Dump

Here's a nice batch of linkage for you.

The Wacky World of Student Loans: How banks rip off college students and the government.
Very brief and informative explanation of how banks are deliberately ripping off the US government (in addition to just you).

Rent-A-Treasure: How to eliminate the black market in stolen antiquities.
An interesting concept to deal with the issue of antiquity ownership.

And from Best Week Ever:
Toys That Make Us Wish We Were Devil Worshipping Kids: Singing Pizza Elmo
File this commercial under things that are designed for children but more accurately resemble a Korn video. See also: Return to Oz.

Linkage and whatnot

Death Nap: The dangers of tilting back the front seat—don't do it!
Interesting article in Slate about the danger of reclined seats. I am unsurprised that auto manufacturers are unmoved by research and law-suits. Auto companies are in the business of making money, not protecting people. It is the government's lack of movement on this issue that gives me pause.

The Tao of Junk: Pundits bemoan our trade deficit with China. But those container ships aren't heading home empty.
Apparently we are shipping our junk metals etc. to China to be reused there.
I don't want to shock anyone, but can't we use our own scrap to make stuff? Are we not in a HUGE trade deficit? Perhaps not selling China the materials to make things then buying those things from China would be smarter and certainly more ecologically sound.

Airline Tells Woman Her Outfit Won't Fly
Businesses should have the rights to refuse service. Furthermore, I'm tired of seeing everyone's hoohaws. I shouldn't have to see your nether-regions in a restaurant, flight, bus, or anywhere outside of a strip club.
If you wonder why no one respects you, stand in front of a mirror and think, would I vote this woman into public office? Would I trust this woman to invest my money, defend my rights in a court of law, or babysit my child. Try picturing someone who would fit these categories and dress like her.
If you dress like a hooker, don't be surprised if people treat you like one.

Our plans are coming to fruition, Chairman Meow

Have you seen this craziness yet?
Cats That Look Like Hilter

I am extremely amused by this site.
Particularly amusing portion from the FAQ:

I think I may have a Kitler. My cat has a 'tache, and he keeps on annexing my next door neighbour's garden while making a noise that sounds suspiciously like "Lebensraum". How do I put him on the website?

Other thoughts:

-Hitler would probably not enjoy this ridicule.

-Your cats are plotting against you while you sleep.

I will not steal content, I will not steal content. I will not steal content....

Ok, maybe just a little...

Bacon is patient, bacon is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Bacon does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Bacon never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

Check out Six Degrees of Bacon. You will love it.

Just another teaser: